Grammar Girl

Happy 2009!

So I used to work with the coolest chick ever, Gina Smith. Haven't talked to her in about 10 years, though I randomly discovered that she was an award winner when I was checking out the cake decorating results for the California State Fair a couple years ago. (I never think to enter any of the baking contests until, like, the week after the deadline. Atta girl.) Totally funky, extremely smart, and married to a real live rock star dude, that's Gina.

Anyway.

I think of Gina with the change of each year, because she always makes the same resolution: "read more books, watch more movies." With her permission I've copied it since I met her, and it's the only resolution I've been able to keep all year. I wonder if she still makes that resolution. I'll look her up on Facebook and ask.

One of the things Gina and I shared was a fondness for proper punctuation. It's not hard, but sadly, is neglected by the masses. So in honor of my friend Gina, and because apparently I feel the need to preach from a soap box today, here are some gentle reminders for anyone who cares to read on:

How to use an apostrophe

Use it for contractions.
you're = you are, you've = you have
it's = it is, she's = she is
I'm = I am

Use it to show possession:
Dori Gough's camera
Monkey Gough's drumset
Daddy Gough's power tools

If a word ends in s, you can either add an apostrophe s or just an apostrophe; both are correct.
Jesus's life
Davy Jones' locker

If you are showing plural possession, it changes to s apostrophe (s'):
The Goughs' house
The Smiths' cookie jar
The boys' bath toys

(and if it already ends in an s, then you add es apostrophe)
The Joneses' new Wii is getting a lot of play this week!

But here's the thing that irks me, friends. It makes me wince when I read signage on buildings, in stores, on menus, and yes, even in Christmas letters... I hate to see apostrophes added where they don't belong.

When NOT TO USE an apostrophe:

Don't use an apostrophe for the plural of a name.
More than one Gough? They are the Goughs. Not the Gough's. Unless you're talking about the Gough's cookie jar, drumset, or amazingly clean house. Seriously, you should come see it. It's never looked this good.

We had a yummy lunch with the Westbrooks last week.
Vacationing with the Willsons is something we hope to do in the future.

Don't use an apostrophe in a possessive pronoun.
his, hers, its, theirs, ours, yours, whose
They already show possession so they don't need an apostrophe.

A note about its

"It's" is a contraction, use it only if you mean "it is" or "it has."
It's raining, it's pouring, my husband is snoring. (Nope, not Royce. He NEVER snores...)
It's been a nice break, but now I'm eager for preschool to be back in session. (So. Eager.)

There's no apostrophe in "its" when it shows possession:
The dog sucked down the burrito in one swallow, licked its lips, and gave a hearty "woof!"
(I saw that on TV yesterday.)
The dryer has consumed its fill of socks this week, we've got 3 singles again!

I know this post has sentence fragments. And that I often. overuse. periods. But that's commonly accepted blog grammar; I like that it reads how we speak. (And the extra periods are to add emphasis, in case ya didn't already know.) There's also a neglectful lack of capital letters on some blogs I frequent, and I hardly notice. I will gladly overlook such grammar goblins; language is a living, changing entity. But seriously, I just had to speak out on behalf of the apostrophe and the plural.

*Stepping down off soapbox*
Thanks, I feel better now. Time to look up Gina on Facebook and think about some resolutions. Or go start dinner - company's on the way.